With my kids back in school, I have all day at home alone. Except I'm not alone, because I have the company of my two labs, Bonnie & Clyde. And I often wonder what they think about (me) during the day.
Bonnie: She's a klutz, so there's a good chance she's going to drop food on the floor. Stations!
Clyde: We'll just rummage the kitchen counters and the trash when she leaves for the store.
Bonnie: When is she going to clean up these dog fur tumbleweeds all over the house anyway?
Clyde: She's going pee, she must want me to watch her, cause that's what she does to me.
Bonnie: How many times a day can a human pee anyway? She seriously interrupting my nap time.
Clyde: I'll get in the car, if you promise me we're not going to the vet.
Bonnie: I pooped, now pick it up human slave.
Clyde: Look a squirrel! (We think he has ADD.)
Bonnie: Why does she baby talk me? I understand English. Walk. Food. Outside. Food.
Clyde: Did she feed us yet? That Tupperware lid looks delicious. So does the library DVD case.
Bonnie: I don't care what she says, I don't snore.
Clyde: I don't like the looks of that mailman. Biker. Runner. Deer. Dog. Walker. I'll protect her.
Bonnie: She's going to be so proud of me when I bring her this dead bunny.
Clyde: God, did you smell that? And she thinks my farts stink!
Bonnie: Why is she taking pictures of us? Again.
Clyde: Rub my belly! Rub my butt!
Bonnie: Oh god, don't try to spoon me! It's just really weird and awkward when she does that.
Clyde: Spoon me! Rub my belly! Rub my butt! Look a squirrel!
These have been Deep Thoughts by Bonnie & Clyde