Monday, April 4, 2016

The Elephant in the Room


You can't help but notice it when you walk in, it's the elephant in the room.  The pole.  With it being in my bedroom you'd think not many people would see my pole.  However, that's not the case.  I've got kids and those kids have friends that they take up to their rooms, which requires that they pass by my room.  But, that's not the worst of it.  That would be the workmen who come to my house.  And this year with a new roof, new windows and painters.  That's a lot of workmen.  Who've seen my pole.  And probably wondered...

...so, is she a stripper?  

Not that it matters what people think. Or so I tell myself while he silently circumvents my stripper pole to measure the windows behind them.  If he didn't have to take strides to walk around it, I'd almost think it was completely invisible.   Except we can all see it's not.  Which leaves me wanting to explain it.  Not that I do that.  Because that would be totally awkward. Not that it's not deafeningly awkward already.  It's just that it's on mute.  I'm pretty sure the feeling is mutually uncomfortable for both parties.   But, probably for different reasons. 

Unless he's also a post modern feminist, who's pissed because I could get paid more stripping than I can with my Master's degree.  

But, I doubt that's the case.  Even though it's extremely sexist of me to assume, I'm still sticking by that statement.  Which probably makes me a crappy post modern feminist (PMF).  Because when I stereotype men I'm not striving for the equality of all genders, races and sexual orientations as the PMF edict dictates.  But really, could I be worse than Camille Paglia?  No.  Obviously not.   Anyway, I'm getting off track here.  Back to the point. 

 Sometimes I feel defensive about pole dancing.  

I shouldn't.  But, I do. Although it really doesn't matter what you think.  All that matters is that I'm helluva lot stronger and a tad less timid than I was before I started pole.   Oh and I could probably beat you in an arm wresting contest.   And you might want to call me when you need help moving heavy furniture.  So, go ahead and think whatever you want.  Also, I wouldn't be offended if you threw a dollar bill my way if you're so inspired.  Cause god knows this graduate degree is not making it rain money over here!  






  



4 comments:

Stuart Nager said...

You need a tee shirt: "I Pole Dance. Deal With It"

joeh said...

Here is what I would think.

First, that it was a support to keep the ceiling up...i'm a little naive.

Then when you explained what it was I would think you must have a very happy man in your life.

Nancy/BLissed-Out Grandma said...

Hah! What Stuart said. But I respect that you have that slogan in your head already.

Blogger said...

I've just installed iStripper, so I can have the best virtual strippers on my taskbar.

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