Thursday, June 27, 2013

The Precipice

I can't take it anymore.  I'm on the ledge and I'm ready to jump.  I should have done it a long time ago.  But now, I'm acutely aware that I can't avoid it any longer.

Risk.

This ledge is much higher than it looks...
 and I have a fear of heights
It's not that I've circumvented it all these years.  In fact, I've often taken the hard treacherous route instead of the straight and narrow one.  But, I am by nature an extremely private person who shuns the limelight. And now I've written a memoir, it's edited and eventually, it will be published. Emphasis on will.  Which is both exciting as a writer and terrifying as the main character.  It's just that as usual, the path I thought I was on, which was the straight, narrow and flat one, for a change, got rocky.

When I sent off my manuscript to the editor, no one else had read it.  I was really unsure what she'd say.  I knew for sure, I have no idea how to write a book.  I've never had a creative writing class and I'm not a grammar nazi.  So, my expectations were low.  I sure didn't anticipate her urging me to get an agent to pursue a publisher because my book is what the market is looking for right now. Say what?  My plan all along was to self-publish.  And I still may.  

This was me researching agents at the orthodontist's office


I thought I was so close to being finished.  Not so.  Instead, the work has just begun. So,  I bought the latest edition of Writer's Market.  And now I'll be working my ass off sending a bizillion queries out to agents and publishers only to receive a bizillion rejection letters back.  Oh, who am I kidding?  They're not going to send me anything in return.

Unless one of them does.  But if I don't jump, I'll never know.  

10 comments:

  1. YOU GO GIRL, and be sure you're screaming "GERONIMO" the whole way!!!!! You've got tons of supporters and folks that love your writing, why wouldn't these snobby editors love it too???? I can't wait to hear what happens and just how many ACCEPTANCE letters you get!!! :)

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  2. Jump, Marie....
    We are here to catch you and help you reach that zenith you desire.

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  3. Jump! And trust me, the work is never done. Whether you self-publish or get a publishing house, you'll have to promote it. Which will probably be uncomfortable for you as well, but sooo worth it. One good ledge leads to another. And one of my "prove you're not a robot" words is UPWARD.

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  4. Thanks so much for the encouragement guys!

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  5. So exciting Marie! Keep us posted.

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  6. Jump, jump, jump! I told you before you have to do it so I can live vicariously through you! Haha! But seriously, you know what they say about regret right? Better jump instead of wonder in the future how the free fall might have felt.

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  7. Oh for goodness sakes jump! And do not believe for one second you won't get a reply. You may not always get back what you want, but some will send back crucial criticism...AND others may be all over you like a wet tshirt (heck, I'd be all over you if you wore a wet tshirt and hung from a pole again!) Do not underestimate yourself! I cannot wait for this to unfold, and you better make it to Winnipeg for a book signing!

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  8. Thanks ladies! Your confidence and support means more than you know. Love to you all!

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  9. I so remember the Writer's Market. Mine is ancient. I quit sending queries after the first or second rejection. You have to tell yourself that really good writers have had tons of them, so you don't give up. Thanks for nudging me closer to my own precipice again, your post served as a reminder to pursue that elusive book once more!

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  10. That's fantastic and terrifying!

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