I've done a lot of travelling in my life. Lived a lot of different places. And loved it all. Ok, not Oklahoma. Really who came up with the state motto "Oklahoma is ok"? Ok is stretching the bounds of mediocrity and the truth. But, in all my travels, I've never been homesick. Until now.
For most of my adult life I was homeless. Don't get me wrong, my husband and I always rented an apartment, condo or a row house, like in Germany. But when the perplexing question of where are you from came up, I never knew how to answer. Was it the town I grew up in that I hadn't lived in for years? The place we lived last? Or the place I loved most? So then I would go into a long explanation, the way military people and nomads of the desert do, covering all three. Just for clarity's sake.
Then one day, free of any obligations for Craig to return to that double wide tent in Iraq or any post housing that ensures that you have absolutely no privacy whatsoever, we got to choose. Which was really confusing for the first few minutes. Should we move back to the small town in New York I grew up in? Did I mention it's right outside of Buffalo? Um. No. Do we move to Florida where my husbands from? Have you been to Florida in August? Um. No. We decided to move to Colorado. Sight unseen, jobless, friendless and having no idea that everyone in Colorado owns a bike and those really tight biking shorts. And we don't.
But, we moved there anyway. And despite the fact that we didn't graduate from the Air Force Academy, train at the Olympic Training Center, compete in triathalons, ski at Breck (that's Colorado code for the mountains of Breckenridge) and weren't the founders of a conservative religious group, we fit in. Surrounded by trees, mountains, fresh air and the occasional bear, mountain lion or rattlesnake, but most of all, friends. This is home.
And it's where I want to be more than anything today. Don't worry, tomorrow's another day. And don't get me wrong, I love Morocco and I'm sure someday I'll be writing some sappy ass post about how I miss it. I know I will. But I'll be writing it from home where I will be swaying in the breeze on a hammock tied between two trees on my laptop. Until I see a mountain lion and then drop the laptop and run. In which case, I'm pretty sure that sappy ass story is gonna go down with me.
Amazing how we wish for certain things. In my current neighborhood, I am a New Yorker. A place I have not habituated for nigh 4 decades now. I visit Ann Arbor and feel home. Not so much in Boston and its environs. Certainly not in Charlottesville, where I actually made my "marks" (and were not thrilled with my religion or political outlook).
ReplyDeleteNo, as you said, Marie, home is where we make it- despite the trappings of family or the lack thereof.
In six months- you will be home...
Very nice writing. I think of all the places I've lived, Colorado Springs was my favorite. Loved the beauty, despite the harsh winter blizzards that I was not prepared for in the beginning and the all too short summers. Looking back, it was like a little piece of heaven on earth, but I think you can find little bits of heaven in most places if you look closely...well...maybe not Oklahoma, haha. I've been there just once, but husband was born there and for some reason it just seems like a good place to joke about. He's a good sport :)
ReplyDeleteAh love, you bring back such memories! I was raised on a ranch in the rockies--very Laura Ingalls Wilder style. 300 animals and a waterfall on the back of our land. *sigh* However, I believe I actually filled my "snow quota" for life! In Pittsburgh now, will be headed south when the boys are grown...
ReplyDeleteBeautiful picture!
Marie, how much longer will you be in Morocco? That hammock looks awfully inviting...
ReplyDeleteMy husband and I are a lot like you. We left our home towns in MA years ago. Since we've been married we've lived in Hawaii, St Croix, NC, and Florida three times. We're in Florida now but may not be for long as our asses are about to be bounced out of our house... long tragic story. LOL!!
We're gypsies and we'll be fine. Anyway, I know the confusion when somebody asks, Where are you from?" I usually say MA, and leave it at that.
@Roy-Yes, home is where you make it!
ReplyDelete@Clipped-You're right there are bits of heaven everywhere, perhaps even in Oklahoma. Maybe.
@Chantal-After Pittsburgh you're definitely due for some sun!
@Leah where and when where you in Hawaii? We lived there 1996-1999 in a town called Kaneohe on Oahu.
Marie,
ReplyDeleteSorry you wern't feeling it that day. Sometimes there is no place like home. I am in the states now and every single minute reminded of how wonderful of a place I come from. But then I get these washes of boredom, I feel so stuck in between! Also if that's your back yard in Colorado, holy crap!!!!! No wonder you are homesick it looks beautiful!!!!