It Ain't Over

Oh, it ain't over! It CAN't be over! There's so much I still didn't tell you about our safari.

After all I didn't tell you anything about the gorgeous sunset cruise we took in Botswana . See Craig looking all pensive like he just listened to an Air Supply song and is on the verge of tears and is choking them back. Do you?


Photo courtesy of Mark Green

I forgot to tell you that on New Year's Eve we were in Zambia and sat around the campfire listening to Ken's riveting stories about flying on the Concord and Apartheid. Or that we actually stayed up til midnight! (Ok, I was in my tent on the cusp of sleep, but I was still awake. But that counts, right?)


Photo courtesy of Mark Green

Or that at sometime during the trip I started to notice Mark's penchant for taking Air Supply-ish photos of Craig at sunset. Which is a little weird, right?

I neglected to mention how Faith and Sky tempted fate by blowing past that sign urging you not to blow past the sign at Blyde River Canyon, the biggest green canyon in the whole world. Which of course, is in South Africa.


Photo courtesy of Mark Green

Or that later Sky contemplated Evel Knievel-ing over the canyon on this sweet orange moped. But, we thought that would have a far more Thelma and Louise-ish ending.


Photo courtesy of Mark Green

Nor did I mention the time I was so punch drunk taking a shower that I whacked my head pretty good on the shower rod. Which they could hear in the men's room and didn't know if I knocked myself out or if someone needed to rescue me until I started laughing uncontrollably. And then snorting.

I didn't tell you how we horked down on these Botswanian donuts we got at a rest stop. Or that they are like the spawn of donut that mated with a bagel and cream cheese. Totally carb-o-licious!



Then there was that time that the boys went all Lord of the Flies. Ok, it was just Sky. And he didn't kill anyone, but he did start a fire from flint. And that's totally true.



In fact our kids were so relaxed and happy on the trip. Probably because they realized that they do NOT in fact have college funds anymore. So all pressure to make good grades to get into college, well it's now pointless isn't it?

The only small squabbles were who could help cook dinner. Cause they all wanted to help. Which makes me think perhaps I should start cooking outside on a camp stove in the dark lit by a very dim lantern every night.



You know how they say fire and water don't mix? Usually they don't. But, then one day on safari they did. And after I reminded River that holding Ember underwater would extinguish her flame, he threw Ember around in the pool. Consensually even.



Oh yeah, then there was that time that the monkey stole our mango from camp. Which obviously didn't satisfy him.



That brings me to the delicious smokin' hot chicks we scored at camp that totally satisfied us, but totally made the monkey jealous.



Then on the night of Mark and Faith's wedding anniversary we got all crazy! Then we shared a dark chili chocolate bar we'd been saving and snuck into the the posh hotel next door to the campsite. We walked to the end of the dock in the pitch black. Until the boatman reminded us that that was really stupid because of the crocodiles. And then I may or may not have stolen a wash cloth from the hotel. Isn't this how everyone spends their 19th wedding anniversary? It was so cliche.



But I know what your burning question is, who won Team Man or Team Wild? I was thinking it was a tie, until the night before we left when my legs started to swell up with mosquito bites. Which only got bigger and itchier on the long, long plane rides home.



And on the plane, that's when I discovered my biggest and itchiest mosquito bite. And it was on my ass. Realizing it ain't over, 'til it's over. And sadly, it's over. (Even though the itching wasn't for some time.) And the winner? Well, that would be Team Wild with the last point scored in the ass in over time.

Rematch?